2018.08.01
英文メールの書き方：デザイナーに変更を依頼する
こんなシチュエーション、お仕事でありませんか？
依頼していたデザインが提出されてきました。デザイナーに変更点を伝えたいけど、こちらはデザインのプロではないので、あくまで会社の方向性や好みが理由であることを理解してもらいたい。
英文メールで「デザイナーに変更を依頼する」お手本を動画でチェック！
こちらの動画では、伝えるべきメッセージとニュアンスを書き手が考えているところから、以下の内容のメールを実際に英語で書く様子までをご覧いただけます。
———————
アイリーンさん、
ロゴのデザインを期限通りに仕上げてくださり、ありがとうございました。シンプルなフラットデザインが大変気に入っています。
ロゴに使用されている色をBizmatesのテーマカラーに合わせていただけますか？また、色の組み合わせを、できればもっと明るい印象のもののバリエーションをいくつか用意していただければ嬉しいです。
次の役員会が8日にあるので、それまでにバリエーションをいただけないでしょうか？よろしくお願いします。
———————
今後の仕事での英語メールの参考になれば幸いです。
【動画内の”CC”ボタンをクリックして英語字幕を表示！】
【過去の動画を見るにはYoutubeページへ！Subscribe！】
0:00:04.609,0:00:10.500
Hello everyone! Welcome to E-mail Picks.
Just a bit on news: we're thinking of
0:00:10.500,0:00:15.030
making new video content for this
Bizmates channel, so we want to make a
0:00:15.030,0:00:20.220
new video series and it's gonna be
titled: "at work." So we have asked our
0:00:20.220,0:00:24.510
designer to come up with a logo for it
and the sample she submitted just today
0:00:24.510,0:00:29.939
looks like this... we like the overall
design - it's simple. You know we like
0:00:29.939,0:00:33.809
things to be simple, but there are a
couple points that we need to ask our
0:00:33.809,0:00:38.940
designer to change: first of all, the
colors that are being used here give an
0:00:38.940,0:00:43.739
impression that's a little too serious.
We're thinking of making the new video
0:00:43.739,0:00:49.440
series more fun, so we would like the
logo to represent that feel possibly by
0:00:49.440,0:00:54.539
using more vivid colors; the second point
is that we will like our designer to use
0:00:54.539,0:00:59.910
more of our official business colors so
that the viewers can kind of understand
0:00:59.910,0:01:05.129
that this video is also a part of our
overall service. So today, I'm gonna write
0:01:05.129,0:01:10.909
to our designer, Irene, to request that
she make these changes. So here goes:
0:01:10.909,0:01:16.200
Hello, Irene. Thank you for getting the
logo design done in time. We really like
0:01:16.200,0:01:20.310
the simple and flat design you've put
together. We would like the colors used
0:01:20.310,0:01:25.110
to be more in line with the Bizmates
theme colors. Could you try making a few
0:01:25.110,0:01:29.579
variations with different color sets
preferably ones that give a more lively
0:01:29.579,0:01:33.780
feel? My next meeting with the Board of
Directors is on the 8th. Would it be
0:01:33.780,0:01:40.590
possible to get the variations in by
then? Best, Kyota. Okay, so making a request
0:01:40.590,0:01:46.439
to make some changes involves making
criticisms. We can't avoid that, but we
0:01:46.439,0:01:51.030
should communicate in a way that the
other person won't feel hurt. So in the
0:01:51.030,0:01:55.710
first paragraph, I praised the design - and
I am not lying, this is how we feel. We
0:01:55.710,0:02:00.600
think the design looks good.
In the next paragraph, I avoided using
0:02:00.600,0:02:05.610
the word "but" here. If I start the
sentence with "but", it would give an
0:02:05.610,0:02:10.830
impression that the designer did
something wrong. By having no "but" we can
0:02:10.830,0:02:14.540
kind of give an impression that the designer is on the right track.
0:02:14.540,0:02:20.940
Now notice in this sentence that I wrote
"preferably". This is because I want to
0:02:20.940,0:02:25.080
communicate that we are not criticizing
the professional color choices of a
0:02:25.080,0:02:29.790
professional designer, it's just that we
like certain colors better than others.
0:02:29.790,0:02:35.340
And finally, in the last paragraph I set
a time frame for the next submission by
0:02:35.340,0:02:39.570
writing: My next meeting with the board
of directors is on the eighth. Would it
0:02:39.570,0:02:42.240
be possible to get the variations in by
then?
0:02:42.240,0:02:45.810
So there you go, an e-mail to request
changes to a designer.
0:02:45.810,0:02:50.580
I'm sure Irene will make the changes in
no time. Okay so anyway that's it for
0:02:50.580,0:02:54.950
today, thanks for watching. I'll see you
next week.
Hello everyone! Welcome to E-mail Picks.
Just a bit on news: we're thinking of
0:00:10.500,0:00:15.030
making new video content for this
Bizmates channel, so we want to make a
0:00:15.030,0:00:20.220
new video series and it's gonna be
titled: "at work." So we have asked our
0:00:20.220,0:00:24.510
designer to come up with a logo for it
and the sample she submitted just today
0:00:24.510,0:00:29.939
looks like this... we like the overall
design - it's simple. You know we like
0:00:29.939,0:00:33.809
things to be simple, but there are a
couple points that we need to ask our
0:00:33.809,0:00:38.940
designer to change: first of all, the
colors that are being used here give an
0:00:38.940,0:00:43.739
impression that's a little too serious.
We're thinking of making the new video
0:00:43.739,0:00:49.440
series more fun, so we would like the
logo to represent that feel possibly by
0:00:49.440,0:00:54.539
using more vivid colors; the second point
is that we will like our designer to use
0:00:54.539,0:00:59.910
more of our official business colors so
that the viewers can kind of understand
0:00:59.910,0:01:05.129
that this video is also a part of our
overall service. So today, I'm gonna write
0:01:05.129,0:01:10.909
to our designer, Irene, to request that
she make these changes. So here goes:
0:01:10.909,0:01:16.200
Hello, Irene. Thank you for getting the
logo design done in time. We really like
0:01:16.200,0:01:20.310
the simple and flat design you've put
together. We would like the colors used
0:01:20.310,0:01:25.110
to be more in line with the Bizmates
theme colors. Could you try making a few
0:01:25.110,0:01:29.579
variations with different color sets
preferably ones that give a more lively
0:01:29.579,0:01:33.780
feel? My next meeting with the Board of
Directors is on the 8th. Would it be
0:01:33.780,0:01:40.590
possible to get the variations in by
then? Best, Kyota. Okay, so making a request
0:01:40.590,0:01:46.439
to make some changes involves making
criticisms. We can't avoid that, but we
0:01:46.439,0:01:51.030
should communicate in a way that the
other person won't feel hurt. So in the
0:01:51.030,0:01:55.710
first paragraph, I praised the design - and
I am not lying, this is how we feel. We
0:01:55.710,0:02:00.600
think the design looks good.
In the next paragraph, I avoided using
0:02:00.600,0:02:05.610
the word "but" here. If I start the
sentence with "but", it would give an
0:02:05.610,0:02:10.830
impression that the designer did
something wrong. By having no "but" we can
0:02:10.830,0:02:14.540
kind of give an impression that the designer is on the right track.
0:02:14.540,0:02:20.940
Now notice in this sentence that I wrote
"preferably". This is because I want to
0:02:20.940,0:02:25.080
communicate that we are not criticizing
the professional color choices of a
0:02:25.080,0:02:29.790
professional designer, it's just that we
like certain colors better than others.
0:02:29.790,0:02:35.340
And finally, in the last paragraph I set
a time frame for the next submission by
0:02:35.340,0:02:39.570
writing: My next meeting with the board
of directors is on the eighth. Would it
0:02:39.570,0:02:42.240
be possible to get the variations in by
then?
0:02:42.240,0:02:45.810
So there you go, an e-mail to request
changes to a designer.
0:02:45.810,0:02:50.580
I'm sure Irene will make the changes in
no time. Okay so anyway that's it for
0:02:50.580,0:02:54.950
today, thanks for watching. I'll see you
next week.
